Sunday, September 25, 2016

Cheap French Press Coffee for Dummies

Hey fellow broke people who love coffee! Hope you got your favorite cup today and I'm gonna show you how to make a cheap as fuck cup of coffee that tastes great!
  I used to see french presses in thrift stores all the time. I'd heard they were messy, got coffee all over everything and didn't really filter out the grounds well. I assumed they were only for snobby rich folks who had 15 minutes to spare every day to make coffee and enjoy it. Well, I got one for my birthday this year (New of course) and found that not only do I enjoy the relatively quick process but I've saved money and cut back on how much I drink overall.(so rich!) Anyway, you probably don't care, GET TO THE COFFEE, LADY!!

 Gather the shit.
  You'll need coffee, doesn't need to be expensive. This coffee isn't even this brand, it's $4.00 a bag stuff.

  You'll want your favorite mug, mine holds 2 cups.

  The french press. This one was $9.99 at a major retailer with a red sign. It comes with a carafe (the glass part) and a plunger.

  You'll also want a plastic spoon or a straw or something to stir the grounds with. I got some plastic spoons from a local greasy diner for free.





. Fill your mug with clean water.
                                                                  
     Water fountain, tap, bottle. It doesn't really matter as long as it's clean. I use the mug I'm going to drink out of because it's more convenient than trying to use measuring cups, which often aren't the same volume as a coffee mug. Plus it keeps the mug warm.


 Microwave the water until boiling OR use a kettle on a hot plate or stove.

  Water goes around and around for two minutes in my microwave. I'm kind of glad I don't have a kettle, those things are loud. BOILING, I SAY!


Temper your glass carafe.

   While your water is in the microwave, put some hot tap water in the glass part. You don't want to put near boiling water in cold glass, it could explode! I did this once with some glass coffee mugs and a standard drip machine. Not my favorite mess to clean up after. Kitchen smelled great though.

Dump the temper water and add the grounds.

  The water has boiled and you took it out of the microwave or the stove and set it down for about 20 seconds. you don't have to be super timed, just set it aside while you dump the temper water out of the carafe and put in the grounds. How much grounds? depends on what coffee you have and your taste. For dark roasts a little less than a tablespoon per cup is a good rule of thumb, medium roasts get a full rounded tablespoon and light roasts get the same as medium. It depends on how strong you want it to be. Its going to be a richer coffee than out of a drip machine though so keep that in mind.

Pour the hot ass water in on the grounds.



 It's going to look like this. It's totally fine and you want it to get all foamy like this. If the water isn't hot enough, this won't happen and your coffee will be hard to plunge. It's okay if it looks a little clear like above, the grounds have to steep after you stir them. Yep, that's what the little plastic spoon or straw is for! This is called "Blooming" the coffee. It means the grounds start to swell with water and exude coffee.

Stir it a little



Now we swish it to break up the mat of grounds that forms at the top a few seconds after you put the coffee in. See how much darker it is now? Sweet. Okay, you stirred it a little now what?

Put the lid on carefully and walk the fuck away for 2 minutes.

   Put the lid on but don't push down the plunger just yet. The plunger shouldn't just go sliding down when you put the lid on but be careful anyway and hold it up. If it's really bad about it, it's not getting a good seal inside and it's going to make grainy coffee. Now, walk away from it. Go get your phone, pet the cat, gather cream and sugar if you want it, just don't touch the coffee for 2 minutes or maybe 3 if you like it really strong. You will be tempted, I believe in you!

PLUNGE TIME!!!

  Take off the lid, swish the grounds one more time to ensure a clean plunge!
  Put the lid back on and slowly push down,
down,
  all the way down till it stops. See all the foam is still there, YUM!

Pour!

  I couldn't hold the button down when I took this picture but hold the lid when you pour so you don't get any grounds in the cup. This is my favorite part because I feel like a princess or a lady at court.

BAM COFFEE!!

  Thanks to using the mug itself as a measuring cup, you pour the perfect amount, every time. There's even some of that foam on top. Does it make the coffee taste better? I don't have any scientific proof that it does but my human brain likes to see it very much.  The timing? From start to finish it takes about 5 minutes to brew, about as much time as it takes a drip machine. The two longest steps are boiling the water and the steeping. you can go do other stuff during those times.

 Well, that's how easy it is to make french press coffee. You can buy them for pretty cheap up to 8 cup carafes. I'm the only one in the house who drinks the stuff so I only need one cup. You also make yourself look really fancy when you do it and it impresses just about anyone.  Have fun and Stay WIRED!!!! 

No comments:

Post a Comment